❥ Purple Hearts

Mysterious;

That's what I call you.

In a world of your own;

It's vibrant color excits and calm us,

A color that even royalty can't refuse.

We have been bond together,

 ever since I first discovered your lovely scent.

You reach my senses like no other color can,

Though I can't quite understand why you are like this way.

I hope that you will stay,

in my heat; always.

The True Meaning of Friendship

Katy took a deep breath and walked into the school. It was the first day of middle school and she was awed by the largeness of everything. The building was three stories high, the hallways were long and wide, the lockers were twice the size of the lockers she was used to. And everywhere there were kids: talking, laughing, yelling. Katy was so surprised at all of this that she just stood there in wonder. Her old school in Connecticut seemed tiny compared to Longden Middle School. At four feet tall Katy Taylor was smaller than most 7th graders and she found it hard to see over all the students. After standing in the doorway for a few minutes Katy decided it was time to get to her first class: English. Looking at her schedule, she saw that it was on the third floor in room 202. Eager yet worried, she climbed the stairs and looked for the room. She wandered around for a while but couldn't find it anywhere, and was too shy to ask anyone for help. Suddenly someone tapped her on the shoulder and asked:
"Need help finding anything?" Katy jumped and looked behind her; a girl with gorgeous strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes stood smiling expectantly waiting for an answer.
"Yeah, is that obvious that I'm lost?"
“Well, kind of, I've been watching you and you've just been wandering around so I guessed that you were lost; so what do you need to find?"
"My English class is in room 202 and I can't find it anywhere." Katy said hopelessly.
"Really?!" The girl squealed, "That's my first class too. I'll show you where it is. By the way my name's Angela Williams. What's yours?"
"Katy Taylor and I probably wouldn't have gotten lost. . .but I missed the orientation because that was the day we moved in and there were no other times available for me to come see the school."
"Well," Angela said happily, "in a way I’m glad you did get lost, because I got to meet you. I'll introduce you to my other friends at lunchtime. Just meet me in front of the cafeteria at lunch".
They arrived at room 202 just as the bell rang and took seats next to each other. Because they had arrived a bit late they didn't have time to meet other people, but as they sat down Angela waved to a Hispanic girl.
"That's Patricia Bouquet. She's one of my friends and you'll meet her during lunch." Before Katy could respond their teacher walked in and cheerfully said,
"Hello everybody, I hope you are all having a good first day of school. My name is Ms. Palmer. I'm going to tell you a little bit about myself; I am 37 years old and I am terrified of cats." After the laughing died down the teacher shared some information about the upcoming semester, and then the kids introduced themselves. Katy remembered a few names but most of them just went in one ear and out the other. After the class was done Angela helped Katy find her next class then went off to a different class. The morning flew by and before Katy knew it, it was lunchtime.
As she was walking to the cafeteria, she looked around for Angela and there she was, standing by the door of the cafeteria waving frantically and calling out her name. Katy ran over to her and they made their way to the lunch line. The menu was lasagna that looked nothing like the real thing and smelled slightly burnt. Katy looked at it distastefully, but was thankful that she at least had something to eat. Angela showed her to a lunch table where three other girls were sitting. Katy recognized all of them from different classes she had with them. Angela introduced her to them, Jennifer Pritchard, Marcia O'Shea and Patricia Bouquet. Katy soon found out by their conversations that Jennifer was quiet and really friendly and loved art. Marcia was the talkative and daring one and she loved sports. Patricia was the fashion lover. And Angela loved everything and was good at everything, some of her hobbies included: softball, weaving, knitting, photography, and much more activities.
In a matter of weeks, they had become inseparable. Doing everything together and spending almost all of their weekends together. Katy, who at first was scared and quiet, was now a friendly and compassionate girl who was always helping people out and was loved by many people. Even so, her friends sometimes worried about her. She never ate any sweets and was always excusing herself for a few minutes to do something. At first, they all thought she was anorexic, but they at once dismissed the idea, because she always ate plenty of other things and was never thin. After a few weeks of worrying they all decided that she was probably on a diet, but didn't want to tell them about it.

A few months into the semester Katy's class was interrupted one morning by a knock on the door. Ms. Palmer got up to see who it was and to her surprise, the principal Ms. Gilliam was standing at the door with a girl.
"What a pleasant surprise it is to see you Principal Gilliam." Ms. Palmer said. The principal asked to talk to her outside and they closed the door and conferred for a while outside of the classroom. After a few minutes, the principal left and Ms. Palmer entered the room with a new girl.
"Class this is Amanda Yeager, she's new to the town and I hope you all will be able to get to know her." Ms. Palmer led Amanda to a desk that was two seats away from Katy's. Katy looked at her curiously, and then her face became pale.
"Are you okay Katy?" Angela said worryingly.
"I'm fine. I was just a little surprised".
Suddenly Amanda glanced up at them she took one looked at Katy's face. A look of recognition crossed her face, and then she smiled and said,"Teacher, Katy doesn't look so well. May I take her to see the nurse?"
Angela was surprised that Amanda knew Katy's name, but one look at Katy and she saw that Amanda was right. Katy looked even paler than before and she looked like she was going to be sick.
"That's nice of you Amanda." Ms. Palmer said. "Katy would you like to see the nurse?"
It looked like she was about to decline the offer but she looked up at Amanda and saw the expression on her face. It was the kind of expression that said, "If you don't say yes you'll be sorry." Katy nodded weakly and got up. She slowly walked to the door while leaning on Amanda and they left.
They returned 20 minutes later with Katy looking a little bit better and a smug look on Amanda's face. When she got to her desk, Katy sank down and put her head in her hands. Because the teacher was talking, Angela wasn't able to ask Katy any questions and once the class was done, Katy rushed off with a two-word answer to Angela's question. At lunch, Angela waited at their regular table for Katy and when she saw her, she ran over to talk to her, but before she could reach her Amanda appeared out of nowhere and whispered something in Katy's ear. Katy nodded and went up to Angela and told her,
"I'm going to sit with Amanda today; I think she's a little lonely."
"Well then why don't you bring her over to our table, I'm sure Patricia, Marcia and Jennifer would love to meet her." Angela said.
"No!" Katy shouted and then said in a quieter voice, "I mean I don't think Amanda would be comfortable she's kind of shy".
"That's okay. You were kind of shy when we first met you."
"Katy!" An impatient voice shouted, "are you coming or not?"
"I'll be there in a minute," Katy shouted back. "I got to go now. See you later.” and she rushed off to Amanda.

After that incident, Katy started spending less time with her friends and more time with Amanda. She seemed to be getting crosser and less fun. Angela, Jennifer, Patricia, and Marcia all got the feeling that something was going on. One day Jennifer was in the school library during the break and heard Amanda talking to Katy. Even though she knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, Jennifer felt she had to hear what they were talking about. As she listened, she couldn’t believe her ears.
Amanda: "I can't believe that you did that, getting an F on my homework is not acceptable! How could you be so stupid?"
Katy: "I'm sorry I really tried to do well but with all the homework that they give us it's hard to get mine and your homework done."
Amanda: "Well than do my homework first.”
Katy: "I can't or I'll get bad grades.”
Amanda: "So, that's a small price to pay for me keeping your secret. You'd better get me good grades on this project. It's important. Here it is, leave it in the usual place. And remember if you don't do well on this one, I'll tell everyone about your secret."
After the last remark, Amanda walked away leaving Katy on the verge of tears. Stunned Jennifer ran out of the library and over to the place where Angela and everyone sat. She told them all about what she had heard and Angela immediately took charge.
"Go over to Katy and tell her we want to talk to her at my house at 7:30." Angela told Jennifer. "The rest of you come over to my house at 7:15 and we'll ask Katy what's going on."
Everybody agreed to the plan and accordingly at the appointed time they all were sitting in Angela's room waiting for Katy's arrival.
"I just can't believe that Amanda would do that to Katy." Jennifer said in a shocked voice. "I mean how could anyone could be so-” Her sentence was cut off by the doorbell. Angela answered the door and led Katy up to her room. Katy sat down on the bed without saying a word. She looked like she had just lost her favorite pet. Instead of beating around the bush, Angela got right to the point.
"We want to know what's going on with you. Ever since you met Amanda, you've never had time for us and you've been acting a lot different. And Jennifer heard you talking to Amanda today. What's going on?"
There was silence for a minute but Katy finally answered,
"I guess you're all pretty mad at me but before I answer your question I just wanted to say that you probably won't want to be my friend after this and I wanted to say that it was really nice being friends with you."
"We'll always be your friends no matter what you've done." Marcia said.
Katy continued,
"I'm diabetic." she said slowly and sadly. Then she burst into tears. Her friends looked at her than at each other in amazement.
"Is that your big secret?” Patricia said. Katy nodded.
"Did you think that we would abandon you just because of that?” Jennifer said amazed.
Katy looked up, "You mean you still want to be friends with me?"
"Of course we do." Marcia shouted out, "We're best friends."
"Why didn't you tell us before?" Angela said quietly.
"Well it all started a year ago before my family moved." Katy said, "I was at summer camp and I met Amanda. She was a big bully and she read my diary and found out I was diabetic. She told me that she would tell everybody that if I didn't do whatever she told me to do. So, I became her servant for practically half the summer. After a while, I got tired of doing all her chores for her so I told her that I didn't care if she told everybody. So Amanda told everybody, even the people who didn't know me. Suddenly no one wanted to be my friend; apparently, Amanda made it seem worse then it really was. My best friend started ditching me for other people and no one at all talked to me. In fact, they started being mean; tripping me and making fun of me and making my life miserable. And it was all Amanda's fault. My parents knew I was miserable, but they didn't know how to solve the problem. One day my dad got a job offer in California, realizing that this was a good way to make a fresh start, we moved here. And when I saw Amanda that first day I thought I was going to die. She started blackmailing me again and I didn't want the same thing to happen over again so I decided to give in to her. . . . Well that's my story."
Angela respsonsed. "I don't care at all what you said about being diabetic or anything we're your friends and true friends stick with each other no matter what the other person has done and even though they have a disease or something like that a true friend would still love that person. We are your friends and it doesn't matter what Amanda says or what you’re other so-called friends said, we don't care and we'll stick by you. Even if the whole school deserts you we'll still stay by your side and be your friends." Everybody clapped at Angela's speech and they all agreed with her.
The next day Katy told Amanda that she didn't care if she told everybody and told her that she wouldn't do any more of her work. Amanda did publish it in the school newspaper but the reaction to the news was surprising. Instead of rejecting her, students were much nicer and caring then before. As for Amanda, she was rejected because of her reputation of being a bully and snitch. One day, they sat around their lunch table talking and laughing Katy realized that Angela was right; she really did have true friends. 

The Past

As my mind flashes back through the years, 

Down my face roll the tears; 

Desperately looking for love, 

I anxiously look above; 

By looking at my tear filled eyes you will find, 

That death is indeed on my mind; 

I may have the eyes of my father, 

But I am my mother's daughter; 

I feel guilty when I say this, but I'm ashamed of my own family, 

I dont fit in with any of my relatives you see; 

Even though Im living in the present, I dwell on the past, 

Cause in the past, there was a good memory that will forever last.

My Beloved Relative

We cried silently in the church as they blessed her ashes. None of us wanted this to happen. Who would? To lose something you care for so dearly. Someone who gave you so many wonderful memories just gone in a blink of an eye. She took me to my first Broadway play, got me into taking photos, made me love the idea of travel and even taught me how to make sunny-sided up eggs. It wasn't fair. She fought so hard. She didn't want to leave us. She wanted to keep living and continue to watch us grow. This was the kind of woman who didn't complain, she kept smiling and dealt with her problems. She experienced so many things, making people laugh until the end. I didn't know her as much as I should have or I can't remember much. It's just so hard to image someone who has always been there for you to be gone all of a sudden. Yes, we knew she was sick and that this would happen. I guess we were all hoping for some sort of miracle. Why? They told us that she was supposed to die in about three months. . .that was three years ago. She died a week ago. The weirdest part? Being in her apartment and thinking what she did last here; your almost afraid to move anything because if everything changes that means that she really is gone. That you can't talk to her during the christmas eve party, hug her, and tell her about what has happened since the last time you've seen her. The worst part? Realizing that people die everyday and there is nothing anyone can do about it. You can't bring back the dead. Then you start to think about what would happen if everyone else was gone. If everyone else died and left you all alone with no family to lean on. That scared me. It still scares me and I miss her so such. I thought I wouldn't cry as much as I had but seeing my sister and mother cry like that. . . I couldn't help but cry along with them. I couldn't go back and fix it. I couldn't go back and get to know her better. I couldn't go back and save her. All I can do is move on and enjoy all the stories everyone has been telling me about her. Now by now you might be wondering who she was was to me. I'll tell you. She was my aunt. Most people aren't close to some of their relatives and if you knew how big my family was you'd understand how I keep forgetting who's who. But there was just something about her that seemed to keep everyone together. That's what made her who she was.

FINAL DRAFT #4

I can see the light

Shining so brightly near me

I am in the dark

It won't let me go

Consuming bodies and souls

I need the brightness

It's calling me over

I can hear it's gentle voice

I'm stuck in the dark

Reaching my hand out

Trying to come become one with

that wonder light

                                                                                The darkness tries to

                                                                               pull me to it's darkest place

                                                                               I am so very scared

                                                                                Suddenly I glow

                                                                          The hanis darkness is gone

                                                                              I am in the light

Final Draft # 3

       

Always

           His jaw tightened and the veins in his temples throbbed. His eyes flashed darts at me. The words erupted from his mouth: "I can't believe you would do something like this Claudia. How could you do this to us? Do you never think? Does this mean nothing to you? You're such a stupid, bitch." The hiss in his voice sent shivers down my spine. He held his head in both hands and stared at me, on my knees sobbing on the ground. A hand hesitantly reached out towards me. However, when his fingers neared my flesh, instead of touching, they recoiled as if the very contact would burn them. He rose from the bed and stood to pace back and forth only to settle on leaning against the wall in frustration.

"Do you think so little of me, Claudia? Did you think that if you left, I would never find you? You cannot run from me! It is not possible." He banged his fist against the wall and did not even flinch as blood began to pour from his hand. I looked at him with fear in my eyes. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Matthew. I cannot continue with this relationship if you keep hurting me the way you do. What am I supposed to do when you come home every night drunk to the point where you cannot stand? How am I to continue if you are hurting me and yourself with your careless ways? We are married! Yet, you still think that you are single and have no responsibility. This is a pointless fight and you know it, but you will not admit it. Why won't you let me go?"

He looked at me with confusion in his eyes. Pausing in his pacing, he looked away as if thinking about what I asked him. He places his hands slowly in front of his face and looks at them carefully. "I hurt you? In what way have I hurt you? Never have I touched you in a harmful way. Tell me I have not touched you in a way that has caused you harm!" I looked away from his standing form. Can I bear to answer him truthfully? What would lying do now? "Yes, you have touched me. You have hit me to the point where bruises must be hidden by make-up. To the point where every time you come near me, I am afraid for the sake of my life and your child." I look at him expectantly. The news was out now.

Matthew got a far away look in his eyes as he sat back down onto the bed. His eyes traveled to look into mine. I could only stare as he tries to comprehend what I have just told him. "My child? What are you talking about, Claudia? There is no child." I stand with trembling legs and walk towards him slowly, afraid that he may retaliate again. "Yes, there is a child in me that is yours. I was afraid to tell you because I did not know what your reaction would be. I do not want you to hate me for getting pregnant." I whisper the last part and quickly look away.

I could feel his strong arms wrap around me and I tensed slightly at the sudden contact. "I could never hate you for doing something that is unavoidable. Will we keep it? If I can become a better husband to you, can we keep the baby?" He asked this in such a sincere manner that I am actually thinking about it. What am I to do with this? I looked up from the floor and stared at him. I studied his eyes, and reached up tenderly to push the hair back that hides his face. "I would like to try, yes. But, you have to be honest to your word, you have to try. Will you promise to stop drinking every night? Will you promise to watch your temper?" He grabbed my hands and stroked the back of them with his thumbs, while still holding my gaze. "I promise. Always and forever."

Final Draft #2

It Should Have Been Me.... 

Why is it we feel when other people are in pain? We say it but we actually don't know what they're going
through.
Five years ago, you would have seen a young girl, about nine, still in denial a week after her sister's death.
She knew it happened but she didn't want to believe it.
All alone in her room, someone would rarely witness a single crystal tear run down her cheek. At nine years old, she has never seen a dead body....until that one single day that haunts her in her dreams.
She refuses to talk about it. She refuses to get help. She didn't want help. She didn’t need it. She didn't want to go to therapy and tell a complete stranger about her sister's suicide and have the stranger tell her that they know what she's going through. Doubt they do know.
In her room, staring at a closet from her bed, she watched the fabrics of her clothing. To you it may just be clothes. But to her, they show her pictures. Pictures of what use to be and what is now. Things of past memories. Things of heartache and happiness.
As the young girl's nose get stuffy and her eyes watery and red, people outside her door people go about their lives.
If they can do it...Why can't she?
Because she is so young and doesn't know any better.
Her once pure and happy heart turns scared and hopeless. Her once bright eyes, turned dull. Her once shining smile, turned to a dark frown.
Like she said, she didn't need help. She doesn't need the same stranger barging into her life thinking they been through what she did. THEY DIDN'T! No one did. She's left in her little world ALL ALONE. Even if so many people roam around her, she still feels alone. Gone-- because of a memory so long ago.
Would you know how it feels to disappear from the world at nine years of age? Do you know how she feels living up to her sister's story? Do you know how hard it is for her to tell the story of her sister's death? Or how hard it is to hold her tears back?
No one understands! No one cares!
All alone, this poor disgrace of a girl.
It was her fault that her sister tied that rope around her neck- It was all her fault. People tell her it wasn't but she KNOWS what's true. But yet, she sits and nods her head in agreement with them. But she knows deep within her heart: she disagrees with ALL of them.
All she thinks now is: "It should have been me."